Childhood's End

The Toymaker Assassination Saga


17th Dec 2018, 10:21 PM
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Author Notes:

lirvilas 17th Dec 2018, 10:21 PM
lirvilas which our goon squad is roughly treated.


A big thanks to AmeliaP for guilt-tripping me into posting this thing up... time for another run, this time maybe to the end?
Microraptor 18th Dec 2018, 10:57 AM
What Tona's men don't realize is that the teddy actually agrees with them on one specific political issue, for he too is all for the right to bear arms...


anonymous coward 18th Dec 2018, 1:03 AM
This looks pretty sweet and violently hilarious, but I got stuck on contemplating the murder bear with its claws in ̵M̵i̵c̵h̵e̵a̵l̵ ̵J̵a̵c̵k̵s̵o̵n Chuck's chest.

I want to see the project proposal, maintenance manuals, and user manual for that murderbear robot. If it's just a tech demo toy or a limited production run animatronic for theme parks and movie studios, then that's that. I'm hoping there's more to it though, and am trying to imagine a profitable market case for those things. Who needs murderbear robots, that can afford them, and how will they get used?
lirvilas 18th Dec 2018, 7:52 AM
Gonna have to be polite and assume you're at an overseas location where you're not acquainted with the recent and alarming growth in the size and purchasing power of the Five Nights at Freddy's fetish crowd.
Microraptor 18th Dec 2018, 11:19 AM
Of course it's always fun to overthink stuff a bit while on the search for in-universe justifications.
But consider that this didn't start with a grand and well thought up world building plan, but instead with what was at that time just a one-off gag about the ridiculous bizarreness of Felicia Kingsley running away from a giant toy.
lirvilas 18th Dec 2018, 12:03 PM
Also: in a just world there would be a ska band called “Murderbear”.
ProfEtheric 18th Dec 2018, 1:25 PM
@ lirv: Consider a ska band named Murderbear added to AB canon.

There are a lot of bands in Autumn Bay...

(Yeah, yeah, I know. Sourcebook...)
anonymous coward 19th Dec 2018, 2:51 AM
I suppose non-American status doesn't let me plead the fifth then thanks to the doctrine of American exceptionalism, does it?

Murderbear is a great name for a ska band, but the world music industry only supports so many of those. Probably fewer than we really need.

I grasp the hilariously improvisational origin of this work owing to loose threads dangling from other works, and attempts to answer unsolved questions. Aren't I asking similar kinds of questions to the ones that inspire this work? :)
ProfEtheric 18th Dec 2018, 4:01 AM
More twisted and awesome than I could have dreamed.

What the absolute fuck was going on in the R&D department of ToyCo to have produced some of this shit. Seriously.

Who sits there and thinks "what we really need is killer toys"? Better yet, who signs off on that?

The page is freakin' awesome, though. Excellent composition (a thing I have been studying of late to more effectively use as a weapon in my arsenal). :)
lirvilas 18th Dec 2018, 7:54 AM
Obviously you haven't considered that large number of products that don't pass child safety tests.


Freehanded everything here with the exception of ripping off a Superman vs. Doomsday fight scene.
ProfEtheric 18th Dec 2018, 1:23 PM
@ lirv: I thought that pose looked familiar! If you're going to "steal", there is no shame in "stealing" from the best selling graphic novel of all time!

There is "not passing child safety tests", and then there's straight "designed this for the abattoir before I found out I was supposed to be designing for a daycare".
Microraptor 18th Dec 2018, 11:04 AM
We know who the CEO is, so the question of who signs off on that is quite easy to answer. ;-)

And the "products that turned out to be too dangerous" angle is currently my head canon too.
(Though of course it still doesn't explain how the product designers can miss the mark so grossly in the first place...)
sigpig 18th Dec 2018, 10:48 AM
Panel 3 - I bet he says that to ALL his boyfriends...
Microraptor 18th Dec 2018, 11:23 AM
Those are probably not the kind of toys they usually use, though...
lirvilas 18th Dec 2018, 12:00 PM
sigpig 19th Dec 2018, 11:16 AM
YOU'RE the one who introduced gay Nazi bikers...
lirvilas 19th Dec 2018, 1:44 PM
Come on man, that only happened like one time last week. SRSly, this is a sober work with deeply sophisticated humor and introspection and shit.
AmeliaP 26th Dec 2018, 7:34 PM
Woo-hoo! That's cool for sure!

(ouch, the massive Teddy bear won the fight apparently)
lirvilas 26th Dec 2018, 7:46 PM
I mean, reanimated corpses are cool and all, but if you think about it, pissed-off bears are really really scary.
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